I made this little translation cheat-sheet because I realized today that I say a lot of things like:

“Honey, what was that thing he did the other day? Oh shoot. Was it something he said, or…ate or…HONEY! What the hell was that adorable thing he did the other day!? I can’t remember!”

Will is really talking now. A lot. I’m pretty sure he said “damn it” the other day. Twice. I blame the daycare for that one, obviously. Anyways, he is repeating EV-ER-Y-THING-UH. In my futile attempt to put him to sleep last night, I started to whisper, “…and Daddy went night-night, and Grandma went night-night, and the moon went night-night, and Jeremiah went night-night…” and he just repeated them all as I went along, with a few slip-ups along the way (he calls his cousin Jeremiah “Jamima” like the syrup and his cousin Lilah “La la” like the song.) While at his two-year check-up at the doctor’s, we were hoping to God he wouldn’t yell “big cock!” when he saw the big truck parked outside the window.

The point is a) he’s saying all this weird, adorable, and unknowingly inappropriate stuff and b) I don’t want to forget how weirdly and adorably and inappropriately he’s saying it. I’d like to avoid having a meltdown in the car, sixteen years from now, as we pull away, leaving him at college all because I can’t remember how he used to say “Kibby” instead of “Kirby” when referring to his teddy bear.

Problemo solved. I got my handy-dandy translation guide right here. Who knows, there may even be a follow-up to this session of Toddler-Speak 101.

So, this post is slightly selfish – written for me, m’self, and I. But feel free to study. I hope you enjoy the class and tell your friends all about it.